Hi, Self.

Hi to you, Self. It's been a long time since, don't you think? But my, out of nowhere, I prayed for you today, as I washed the rice me and mother have to take for dinner, I prayed for you, alright. I said to Them, 

"Lord, God, Mama Mary. I pray for the soul of this girl that I greatly know and do not know. Align her priorities for the rest of the year and next year. She must know that she is not getting any younger. The world doesn't go backward, apparently. It's not always that she would be backed by her parents all the time. It will not be always that her mother have to repeatedly shout "Inday! Gising na, tatanghaliin ka na naman sa trabaho nyan!" during mornings all the days of her life. The world doesn't work that way. Instill in her always the blessing of having a father, a mother, brothers and their families as her support system on her life. And also the constant presence of friends. Teach her to invest. Not just on money. But teach her that the greatest investment a person could ever have is the investment of having a life. Teach her the value of time; that it is to be consumed like water must be consumed, it has to be consumed slowly during mornings before taking a bath, before meal and before dinner, at least eight glasses of it. Or else life will stop beating all of a sudden. The essence of time will be lost, then. Who would she be without her parents around her, or if she'd be lucky to grow old with them, what must be her resources to support them? No, dear you can't turn to your brothers right now, let her realized that. It is not an option. They care, of course, there is no doubt about it, but their families are their own priorities now. She's on her own, making her own choices. Taking too hard on it most of the time. What a turtle this person, can't she moved more fast. At least have her that. Teach her to be strong that nothing can break her except love. Teach her to focus. Teach her to grow up. Teach her not be to fucking scared always; with the idea of herself, with her feelings, with the smell of death surrounding her everyday, with the way the world look at her. Challenge her to the point where she woke up the next day believing with and in herself more. Cultivate her love for smaller things in life, from books, music, movies, catch phrases she have picked scattered everywhere. 

She is currently working on passing that civil service exam this year. It is her second time to take it. Heal the wound that she had in her by letting her pass this time. But be tough on her that in order to pass, it must be give and take, that wishing is different from praying. Let her act on it. She believes that she is not of those materialistic peoples but her mind is in constant ache with things like, "I want to buy a new phone on my next payday", "I want to buy a new book today", "I want a new pen today" among others. Let her realized that she just couldn't allow herself to be a wanting machine of whims everyday of her life. She has to pull herself up from that. Instill that in her. Fix her. Strengthen her priorities; along with it the dream of having that house of their own, where she wants her parents to live for as long as whenever life allows it for them. If she couldn't find a husband, if not right away, if not ever, at least let these simple dreams of her come true." x